A transsexual parent recounts his transition.

Abstract

Changes in family systems have concerned norms, roles and relational styles. The presence of a trans-sexual father or mother represents a specific condition in the parenting function. When a parent decides to come out about his or her transsexualism, the process of disclosure becomes a family issue and this coming-out may cause, in the transsexual’s partner, sexual rejection, disillusion, anger, identity crisis, alteration in one’s system of beliefs and concern for one’s children. The adjustment process to trans-sexual parenthood entails the acceptance of this new condition and a focusing on the care function, independently of the relationship of the couple. Moreover, difficulties at the level of the couple tend to influence other areas and especially the parenting function. A trans-sexual FtM individual responded to a semi-structured interview on his coming out and his transition experiences. F is a trans-sexual who began his transition after the birth of his two children. His account of his experience regards the following themes: the couple’s relationship, reactions to the coming-out from the family of origin, the incongruence between personal and social identity and the need to proceed with sex-reassignment surgery so that one may obtain modifications to registered personal data. With regard to the process of the family’s adjustment to a parent’s transsexualism, it is possible to provide a few recommendations: it is advantageous for a trans-sexual parent (with a partner’s support) to tell one’s children as soon as possible about one’s new condition; it is preferable for parents to agree on the facts of the revelation, adopt accessible language, be available to talk about transsexualism and to answer all questions. These precautions may enhance the stability of the parent-child relationship and avoid potential concerns about being abandoned, the onset of a sense of guilt or a hostile reaction.